Christians are straight up FREAKS
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
Randomize
