I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
She's like a pop up book from hell.
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
Randomize
