it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
Randomize
