butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
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