When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Randomize
