why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
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