found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
Randomize
