I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
Randomize
