she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
I FOUND THE LEGS
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
Randomize
