our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
Randomize
