Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
Randomize
