OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
I made him laugh his dick is mine
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
Randomize
