i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
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