Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
I stole a fireplace last night.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
Never joke about your clitoris.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
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