So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
Randomize
