i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
Your penis caused this!
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
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