IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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