My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
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