Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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