Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
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