We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
Randomize
