ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
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