they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
