when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
Randomize