Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
