do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
You can't just leave with hair like that
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
look, im sorry that i yelled at your little brother, threw my car keys at him and smashed a stale cookie with a pool cue, but i swear to god i didn't poop on the floor. it was one of your dogs.
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