he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
