Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
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