Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
Why is "Oprah of drinks" written on my arms?
You said to write it on you, after you kept saying, "You get a drink, you get a drink, everyone gets a drink."
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
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