The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
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