I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
Randomize