i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
On the way home she put on a necklace with her name on it and wrote my name in sharpie across my chest so that in the morning we could avoid the awkward Idk who the fuck you are conversation. Best. Girl. Ever.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
Randomize
