I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
Randomize