Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
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