After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
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