So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
All I want is to send a text that says "i slept with someone while wearing nothing but purple argyle socks this weekend." But the only person i would send that to is you. But you already know. Because they were your socks.
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
Randomize
