Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
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