oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
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