you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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