How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
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