you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
The walls in my apartment are so thin that sometimes when I fart, I stop to listen if people are laughing next door.
at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
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