Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
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