There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
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