They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
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