Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
Randomize
