Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Randomize
