were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
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