Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
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