I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
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