don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
Randomize
